Theme: See through fake love and remove the beautiful filter
1.1｜Is the person you fall in love with him or is it the vision of "longing to be loved" in your heart?
You think you love him:
- He is gentle, considerate and can understand what you say
- He seems to resonate with your soul, and every word he says touches the softest part of your heart.
- He tells you: "You are different from others" and "I really care about you"
But now you look back and you'll find...
He doesn't really "understand you", he justActing like you want to be loved.
He is the "mirror of your wishes", not the "real person".
1.2｜How does a manipulative personality “copy the personality you desire”?
They didn't love you that much from the beginning.
Instead:
- Sensitively capture your needs, vulnerabilities, beliefs and wounds
- Quickly connect to "what your ideal lover looks like"
- Use the language, behavior, and emotional responses you desire to "feed" you just right
You thought you had met your soul mate.
In fact, you have fallen into a **"projection in exchange for emotion" induced script".**
1.3｜You are not too easily deceived, but you are too eager to "finally be loved well"
If you have been deficient since childhood:
- The feeling of being truly seen
- A space of gentle understanding
- A relationship where you are loved securely, without exchange or proof
So,Your desire for intimacy and understanding is very strong..
The manipulative personality takes advantage of this:
They replicate the "love" you desire, and then make you voluntarily give up your trust, boundaries, and self.
You are not stupid.You are too pure and want to believe too much in the warm side of human nature.
1.4｜Thinking Breakthrough Exercise: Write down 3 sentences that have touched you and dismantle their psychological hooks
**Please recall: **In the early stages of the relationship, what did he say that made you fall for him instantly?
for example:
- "You are the only one who understands me"
- “I’ve never felt so at ease.”
- "I really feel like you're the one for me"
- "Every word you say makes me feel bad for you"
- "You make me want to love someone properly"
Then,Next to it you write:
- Which desire to be understood/needed/cherished" does this sentence activate in me?
- Behind this sentence, is it a true understanding of me, or a precise feeding?
- After he said these words, did he really have long-term behavior to prove this feeling?
- Did this make it easier for me to give in, sacrifice, and compromise for him later?
1.5｜Awakening Sentences·Written to you who are awake at this moment
“What I fell in love with was not a soul, but a script.
I didn’t fall in love with the wrong person, but I haven’t been truly loved for too long.
So much so that a little bit of tenderness can make me think it is eternal."
1.6｜Today’s Practice Task (Healing Writing)
Please write a short message:
To the "ideal lover" you once believed in:
- Who are you?
- What did I think of you?
- Now I see what you are?
- What does this relationship really bring me?
- What am I choosing to stop believing in today? What am I taking with me?
(You can save it in your notes, write it down on paper, or send it to me, and I can also write back to you)
